...And miles to go before I sleep

Sometimes I find myself expecting every bare flat chest I see to have surgery scars. If there are no scars, I think to myself, “Wow, that’s one hell of a peri job - I wonder who the surgeon was? Ohhh…right.”

Usually when I’m searching for a realistic silicone cock to purchase, I peruse through the selections of Vixen Creations, Tantus, and Good Vibrations, as they are brands that are well-known and trusted by many people for their superior quality. One evening, I was feeling adventurous and decided to search “realistic silicone dildo” on Google Shopping and was thrilled to come across a new, unexpected manufacturer of realistic silicone cocks: Fleshjack by Fleshlight. I had known that Fleshlight produces the original Mr. Limpy soft packer and the popular Fleshlight masturbation toy that I always wind up sticking my fingers in when I’m in Babeland, but I had no idea that they had a division that produced super realistic silicone cocks!

When I entered the website, I clicked on the Fleshjack Boys link and found that there were 11 different realistic cocks to choose from. Each cock was a detailed, exact silicone replica of one of the Fleshjack Boys’ cocks. There were about 10 images of each cock - 5 with the model holding it and 5 of it alone from different angles. I meticulously browsed through the listed dimensions and images in order to find a cock that would work best for my partner and I. Most of the cocks were very large - which would not be comfortable for MC - so I selected one of the smaller ones, Jason’s Dick.

The cock arrived at my apartment in discrete packaging. I opened it up and marveled at the details of the cock; this was definitely the most realistic silicone cock I had ever beheld. When I handled it, it felt rigid enough for my liking, unlike some of the VixSkin cocks I’ve used. It was the first cock I ever had with balls at the base.

Since receiving this cock, I’ve used it for penetrative sex (while wearing my Spareparts Joque harness) and to receive oral sex. My experiences have been enjoyable so far. While the texture of the cock doesn’t feel as realistic as the VixSkin cocks, I find that other aspects make up for that. The two most important factors for me, aesthetics and rigidity/firmess, are both above satisfactory. I love that I can fuck really fast without it bending and falling out of my partner, and that when I look down, I see something that looks like it could be attached to my body. My partner has positive feedback about this cock, as well. While it is slightly larger than what she’s used to, she enjoys the smooth but noticeable texture that is created by the veins and crevices of the cock. She said that it’s not too slippery or too “grippy” and has a nice medium texture. Like myself, she is also a fan of the firmness that allows for fast, reliable penetration.

While I have mostly complimentary things to say about this cock, there are some things I would change if possible. For one, it would be great if the cock had a  flared base behind the balls, like the Goodfella, as this would make it more harness compatible. During penetrative sex, there were a few times I had to reach down into my harness and adjust the position of the cock and balls; I think a flared based would help keep the cock in a more stable position. I should also mention that the top of the base of the balls has the signature of Jason Visconti, the model, embossed on it, which doesn’t bother me but might bug other people. My next issue is with the coloring of the cock. I noticed that all of the Fleshjack Boys appeared to have light skin tones, which resulted in their cock replicas being mostly the same color. This is unfortunate for multiple reasons. Why not have more diversity among the Flesh Boys? Doing so would also allow for the creation of cocks that would be more suitable for people with darker skin tones who want a realistic silicone cock. My last comment is about the marketing of the FleshJack Boys’ cocks. It seems like they are solely geared toward gay cisgender men. It would be great if the company acknowledged that there are a variety of people outside of cisgender gay men who might find these cocks appealing, such as female-assigned-at-birth folks who like to wear a realistic cocks or people who like to penetrate their vaginas or anuses during masturbation with realistic cocks.

Overall, this is a superb realistic cock that makes an ideal prosthetic during sexual activities. It sells for $50.96, which is a very competitive price for a cock of its appearance, size, and material. I must also add that Fleshlight’s customer service is excellent. I hope that by writing this review that other people who love wearing realistic silicone cocks will have another option to chose from when searching for an ideal cock.

(More photos under “Read More”)

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Transfans are people who are sexually attracted to transgender people. Other terms include tranny chaser, trans catcher, transsensual and tranny hawk.^[1]Sexologists have used two technical names for the sexual preference for male-to-female transsexuals: gynandromorphophilia^[2] and gynemimetophilia.^[3]Andromimetophilia is an analogous term that denotes attraction to female-assigned people who look, act like, or are men; including butch women, or trans men.^[4]

(For the record, I totally prefer the term “transfan” over “tranny chaser”, as I’m not comfortable with using the word “tranny”.)

In response to my last video:

First: dude youre a gay stop abusing your body and accept what you are.i have really low levels but i hardly look like a chick ;you look like a girl

Later: lol sorry abt my comment ,didnt know you are a tran ,should have put a tag

At least this person attempted to apologize, ha.

Thank you. My chest has always been relatively small. I haven’t noticed much of a difference in size since working out or starting T.

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I work as a speech-language therapist at an elementary school for children ages 5 - 12 with a diagnosis of autism. To be honest, the thought of ever coming out at work terrifies me and I try not to meditate on it. What frightens me the most is how parents will react to the news. I’m also fearful about how staff and administration will treat me when I’m living full-time as a male. I’ve posted in the past about some of things (#work) I’ve heard parents or administration say about or to male workers at my job, and it’s clear that there is a double standard.

During my transition, sometimes my co-workers have said something along the lines “You sound sick” and I will just agree with them and carry on. My voice change has been so gradual that it doesn’t draw too much attention. I plan on staying “in the closet” at my job for as long as I can. It’s uncomfortable but I rather that than endure discrimination and be a victim of people’s ridiculous double standards.

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I noticed that my sparse upper lip and sideburn sprouts are coming in quicker this week. I usually only have to shave once a week before the stubble becomes too noticeable (I don’t want anyone at work to notice), but this week I had to shave on both Monday and Wednesday.

Join us in one of these ongoing monthly groups to improve the masculine or feminine aspects of your voice.

****Now longer sessions – 1.5 hours instead of 1 hour
****More program components: Voice experience discussion, speech drills, optional speaking in front of a group, homework

Date: Mon, Jan 23, 2012
Masculine voice: 6:00 – 7:30pm, Conversation style
Feminine voice: 7:30 – 9:00pm, Higher pitch
Fee: $30.00
Where: 65 Broadway, Suite 901, New York NY 10006; 4/5 to Wall St; 1/R to Rector; A to Fulton
Sign up or inquire: Christie Block at cblock@cblock.net or 347-677-3619 by Thurs, Jan 19th

…AND ANNOUNCING AN INTENSIVE TRANSGENDER VOICE CLASS – SPRING 2012

Who: Designed for 4-8 people, transmasculine OR transfeminine, depending on how many people sign up
When: 1x per week for 8 weeks, starting Mon, Feb 27, 2012, 7:00 - 9:00 pm
What:

— Individual screenings: Meet alone with me during the 1st and last classes, to determine your current level, goals, and progress
— Topics: Vocal hygiene, breathing, loudness, pitch, intonation, resonance, and articulation
— Process: Speech drills, listening/feeling tasks, individualized practice, real-life exercises, homework

Fee: $360.00
Where: 65 Broadway, Suite 901, New York NY 10006; 4/5 to Wall St; 1/R to Rector; A to Fulton
Sign up or inquire: Christie Block at cblock@cblock.net or 347-677-3619 by Thurs, Jan 26th

Since I started taking testosterone cream a week ago, I’ve been putting a tiny bit on my cock each day; I’ve already seen some growth results that seem to be more substantial than when I’ve taken testosterone injections or patches.

I’ve been on the testosterone cream since Tuesday, January 3rd. This is mostly just a record-keeping post.

QuORUM (Queers Organizing for Radical Unity and Mobilization) is a consensus-based collective of radical queers in New York City.  We work to strengthen community through organizing sustainable collaborative projects that nurture intentional spaces.  The spaces we work in include collective homes, social and cultural events, and other sites of mutual aid.  Our work cultivates learning, skill and resource sharing, friendship, and thoughtful communication.  We hope to build an empowered queer network that fosters respect, diversity and social justice.

More schedule coming very soon!

facebook.com/QuORUMnyc

I’m rather thrifty and tend to avoid buying from big corporations. After searching craigslist and eBay for rash guards and finding none in my size, I went to Target and bought one for about $12 from the boy’s department. You can try checking Target.com and Amazon.com for affordable rash guards. Good luck!

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Thank you! Check out my last Formspring response - I go into some detail of what exercises I like to do. One thing I forgot to mention is that I drink a protein shake containing 50 grams of protein after each workout; doing so is supposed to aid in the growth of muscle mass.

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I have a post from a few weeks back in which I discuss my general workout routine here. Currently, I target biceps, triceps, and my back on one day, and shoulders, lats, traps, and chest on another. I try to get to the gym at least three days per week, but my ideal is four. I target my abs a couple of times per week.

Right now I am satisfied with “body fat” content and have been really slacking on doing cardio exercises, but if that’s something you want to work on, you should incorporate cardio exercise (treadmill, jogging, brisk walking, elliptical machine, etc..) into your exercise routine at least three days per week for 20 minutes. Cardio also assists in general good health and well-being.

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